Clean jokes

Had too much Christmas cheer?

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1. You know you have if you... notice your tie sticking out of your fly. 2. Someone uses your tongue for a coaster. 3. You start kissing the portraits on the wall. 4. You see your underwear hanging from the chandelier. 5. You have to hold on to the floor to keep from sliding off. 6. You strike a match and light your nose. 7. You take off your shoes and wade in the macaroni salad. 8. You hear a duck quacking, and it's you. 9. You complain about the small bathroom after emerging from the closet. 10. You refill your glass from the fish bowl. 11. You tell everyone you have to go home... and the party's at your place. 12. You ask for another ice cube and put it in your pocket. 13. You yawn at the biggest bore in the room... and realize you're in front of the hall mirror. 14. You pick up a roll, and butter your watch. 15. You take out your handkerchief and blow your ear. 16. You tell your best joke to the rubber plant. 17. You realize you're the only one under the coffee table.

Other Clean jokes

The Cow and the Chicken

So there is a cow and a chicken. And the cow goes... Baak!Baak! LOL (why would a cow go baak!?!) LOL...Read the whole joke

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A husband and wife stepped up to view the body of his mother-in-law. As he began to cry, his wife pu...Read the whole joke

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Top Ten Subtle Differences Between College And Hell

10. It doesn't snow in Hell.9. Everyone has heard of Hell.8. It's more fun getting into Hell.7. You ...Read the whole joke

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Did you ever wonder?

Can you cry under water?How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinat...Read the whole joke

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Mohammed and Douglas Adams

Q: What do Mohammed and Douglas Adams have in common?A: A deep, abiding respect for the value of a t...Read the whole joke

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You know you drink too much coffee when...

1. Juan Valdez names his mule after you.2. You chew on your roommate's fingernails. 3. You can jump-...Read the whole joke

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Death becomes nerd

A truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops in a bar for a beer. As he approach...Read the whole joke

Rating: - Category: Clean

God vs Satan

And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach and green and yellow vegetable...Read the whole joke

Rating: - Category: Clean

You Know You're Out Of College When...

1. Your salary is less than your tuition.2. Your potted plants stay alive.3. Shacking in a twin-size...Read the whole joke

Rating: - Category: Clean

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