Instrument jokes

A Choristers' Guide To Keeping Conductors In Line

|The basic training of every singer should, of course, include myriad types of practical and theoret...Read the whole joke

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Accordion jokes

|An accordion is a bagpipe with pleats.Q: What is the definition of an optimist?A: An accordion play...Read the whole joke

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Any last requests?

|A cowboy and a biker are on death row, and are to be executed on the same day. The day comes, and t...Read the whole joke

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Arriving at Heaven

|A soprano died and went to Heaven. St. Peter stopped her at the gate asking, "Well, how many false ...Read the whole joke

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Arriving in Heaven

|Arriving in HeavenThree men die and go to heaven and queue to meet St. Peter.St. Peter: Hi, what's ...Read the whole joke

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Bach in a Minuet

|A note left for a pianist from his wifeGone Chopin, (have Liszt), Bach in a Minuet...Read the whole joke

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Bagpipe jokes

|Q: Why do bagpipers walk when they play?A: To get away from the noise.Q: What's the only thing wors...Read the whole joke

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Banjo jokes

|Q: How many banjo players does it take to change a light bulb?A: Only one, but all the others gathe...Read the whole joke

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Bass jokes

|Q: Why did the bass player get mad at the timpanist?A: He turned a peg and wouldn't tell the bass p...Read the whole joke

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Bassoon jokes

|Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?A: To get away from the bassoon recital.Q: Why is a bassoon b...Read the whole joke

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Cello jokes

|Q: What is the difference between a cello and a coffin?A: The coffin has the corpse on the inside.Q...Read the whole joke

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Clarinet jokes

|Q: What's the definition of a nerd?A: Someone who has his or her own alto clarinet.Q: Why do clarin...Read the whole joke

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Contacting a friend

|Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies first, he will contact the other and tell him what lif...Read the whole joke

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Drum joke Q & A

|Q: Why do drummers have a half ounce more brains than horses?A: So they don't disgrace themselves a...Read the whole joke

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Efficiency

|From: Efficiency & Ticket, Ltd., Management ConsultantsTo: Chairman, The London Symphony OrchestraR...Read the whole joke

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English horn jokes

|Q: What is the difference between hearing an English horn solo and being tortured?A: One is far mor...Read the whole joke

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Fight between the musicians

|At a concert hall one night, the stage manager comes across an oboe player and a viola player havin...Read the whole joke

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Flute jokes

|Q: What's the definition of a minor second?A: Two flutes playing a unison.Flute players spend half ...Read the whole joke

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French horn jokes

|Q: What do you get when you cross a French horn player with a goal post?A: A goal post that can't m...Read the whole joke

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George Bernard Shaw

|While at a concert being performed by a very bad orchestra, George Bernard Shaw was asked what he'd...Read the whole joke

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